But the terror of intimacy overcame my determination to prove my fearlessness.
There's a lot of resistance to feminism from people terrified of what a world with gender equality looks like, but one of the powerful things it does is reframe girlhood as something that exists even when there is no one else around to look at it.
My absence of self worth perhaps coupled with the fact my family was due to return to Australia, making me a problem that would also be easily removed made me susceptible to Roger's crude charms.
She had just had their second baby and was, according to Roger, no longer interested in sleeping with him.
.
I actually felt flattered and grateful that he thought I was attractive.